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Thread: Troll Warlord (Valve Lore)

  1. #1
    Volunteer Moderator Hefaistus's Avatar
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    Troll Warlord (Valve Lore)



    It's an easy thing to offend a troll. A prickly and contentious race, trolls thrive on argument and strife, missing no excuse to raise their voices in dispute. Males grow to maturity in subterranean chambers beneath their matriarch's domicile, feeding and amusing themselves while contributing nothing. Often they stay for years beyond the age of maturity, while the matriarch provides them with sustenance. When young trolls are finally pushed from their sub-chamber, they gather with others of their kind, forming roving gangs of malcontents who complain loudly about all manner of vexation.

    As much as trolls love to argue, imagine how rare it is for a troll to be driven from his own kind for being too difficult to get along with. Such was Jah'rakal's fate, a monger troll from deep in the Hoven. So deluded was he, so bitter and abrasive, that even other trolls found his company intolerable. After one particularly vitriolic outburst in which he claimed the lion's share of loot from their latest raid, his cohorts finally snapped. They turned on him, beat him with clubs, and drove him from the encampment. Enraged at his banishment, he returned the next day, armed with steel, and slew them all, one by one. He then swore a blood oath: he would ever after be a fighting force unto himself. Now he roams the world as the Troll Warlord, bitter and angry, the Imperial high commander of an army of one.
    Last edited by Hefaistus; 01-23-2013 at 03:36 PM. Reason: Updated per Kosmo's post
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    I find it hilarious, it's indirectly mocking Internet Trolls. You're only offended by this if the boot fits.

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    Basic Member Adilmaru's Avatar
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    Great job Valve !

  4. #4
    Basic Member 1337_n00b's Avatar
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    Alright, as hilarious as this is, I can't help but feel that this is a step backwards. Backwards from other, slightly more engaging backstories; forward from the atrocities of Medusa and Naga. This is almost like something from HoN, a direct mockery and a very obvious shout-out.

    I don't think I'm liking the situation here.
    Heroes this user should seriously reconsider ever picking again.

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    This is amazing and I hope they stick with it indefinitely.

  6. #6
    Valve Developer Kosmo's Avatar
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    Hey all, that wasn't quite the final, final version. Here it is, with the obligatory typo fixed, and the addition of Troll Warlord's name.

    "It's an easy thing to offend a troll. A prickly and contentious race, trolls thrive on argument and strife, missing no excuse to raise their voices in dispute. Males grow to maturity in subterranean chambers beneath their matriarch's domicile, feeding and amusing themselves while contributing nothing. Often they stay for years beyond the age of maturity, while the matriarch provides them with sustenance. When young trolls are finally pushed from their sub-chamber, they gather with others of their kind, forming roving gangs of malcontents who complain loudly about all manner of vexation.

    As much as trolls love to argue, imagine how rare it is for a troll to be driven from his own kind for being too difficult to get along with. Such was Jah'rakal's fate, a monger troll from deep in the Hoven. So deluded was he, so bitter and abrasive, that even other trolls found his company intolerable. After one particularly vitriolic outburst in which he claimed the lion's share of loot from their latest raid, his cohorts finally snapped. They turned on him, beat him with clubs, and drove him from the encampment. Enraged at his banishment, he returned the next day, armed with steel, and slew them all, one by one. He then swore a blood oath: he would ever after be a fighting force unto himself. Now he roams the world as the Toll Warlord, bitter and angry, the Imperial high commander of an army of one."

  7. #7
    Volunteer Moderator Hefaistus's Avatar
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    Updated the OP with the new lore.
    To keep these forums clean and friendly, please read and follow the forum rules.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kosmo View Post
    Now he roams the world as the Toll Warlord, bitter and angry, the Imperial high commander of an army of one.
    And if you don't have exact change, gods help you.
    Last edited by HerrDoktor; 01-23-2013 at 03:36 PM.

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    That is awesome. It really is.

  10. #10
    Basic Member Keowee's Avatar
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    Well, this is a nice one I always portaryed Troll Warlord as an insane walking barrel of TNT (screw Techies).
    Yet this lore kinda ruins all the previous thoughts about the Radiant and Dire affiliations - the lore doesn`t give a single clue for us to justify Troll`s location in the Radiant hero pool.

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